I have never been a big fan of New Years Eve and have spent the last few years in bed watching When Harry Met Sally with a glass (bottle) of wine. The last few weeks I have been busy at work, working both jobs seven days a week, spending all of my free time shopping for presents and then staying up late to wrap. Christmas was a very somber day in my house. It was just my parents and I, and without little kids around the house the day loses its magic. I had a few days off for my birthday and Christmas, and for the first time in months I was able to sit and do nothing. My body would not let me sleep and I was a little restless lounging around on the couch all day. I am used to doing laundry, reorganizing drawers or purging my closet on a day off, but I forced myself to lay on the couch and watch Gilmore Girls for hours. It was harder to do than it sounds, I promise!!
A few days of doing nothing made me appreciate doing nothing. I need to schedule doing more of it during the months ahead. With my anxiety and mental health, I work best when my schedule is constantly booked and I have a million things to do. But in 2017 I need to have more lazy days to sit around with dirty hair in a sloppy bun and fun pajamas. During my hours of Netflix binge watching, I had time to reflect on the past year. A lot of these memories are hard to relive, but I am happy they are in the past and a new year is beginning.
2016 was the year of postponing my own happiness. 2015 was a year of accomplishments and chapters in my life ending. 2016 had so much to offer, but instead, I put a pause on my life to take care of others. I do not regret the decisions I made, but I hope in the next year I can start to make some decisions of my own. For months I kept telling myself that I will start working on my career later, or start to build friendships when I had more time, or start to date again when I was in a better mental state. I went through so much pain, worry and difficult times this past year. But now that I can sit around with my family in our newly renovated house, and I know that everyone is happy and where they need to be. Of course when I write this my dad is recovering from surgery from earlier in the week. I hope that 2016 brings good health to my family, because I do not think I can go to a hospital one more time! I have also learned that if I can make it through this year, I can make it through anything. I don’t have a lot of career victories or life accomplishments this year. I just quit my job and got a part time job in retail while working at a college office a few days a week to pay the bills. I went to college hoping to get a degree in something that will let me help people. But now in the real world I realize that financially I am not able to get a job in social services and still be able to pay rent. Hopefully this will be the year that I move out of my parents house and unpack boxes labeled “future apartment”.
The one good thing about a new year, is that it gives us this time to reflect on the past year, see what we want to change and find ways to improve our life. Cheers to 2016!
Wishing everyone a Happy New Year! I started this blog over a year ago because I was bored and needed a hobby. My parents still don’t understand how this thing works!! Thank you for taking the time to read my blog and like my photos on social media. I hope my life adventures have encouraged you to go to Target because you saw something I found or you like an outfit I posted. I know that we are all on similar paths and journeys, and I hope my posts give you some inspiration. Love ya lots!