This was not the year I was expecting and I am sure my readers will agree.  It was a tough year for me and it made me slow down to find some piece of gratitude each day. While this year had its challenges, by the final days of 2020 I was able to reflect and really understand the saying that everything happens for a reason. I started off this year leaving my job to find a different career path and I quickly went from job interviews to accepting funemployment until there was a vaccine. This was not an easy transition but after sitting down to look at our finances and my mental health, I could use the break to focus on me and we could afford me not working. After years of working long hours, multiple jobs and hustling, it took me a long time to finally breathe and realize you shouldn’t revolve your life around a job.

I’ve sat down a few times to write something that really explains my thoughts as this year comes to an end and another year begins. Nothing really felt right because while I am trying to find the good that came out of a very difficult year, I can’t neglect the bad that also came with it. While this corner of the internet may seem to look like a highlight real, there was a lot of hard conversations, difficult decisions and struggling that happened on my side of a computer. Besides the cancelled trips and staying home for a full year, my relationship had to grow and I had to work on my mental health which wasn’t so good even going into 2020.

I have to give a lot of thanks to Jake because he has been so supportive this year. He has encouraged me to take a year off of work and just enjoy this time.  There were so many days I would feel so guilty that I wasn’t as productive as I thought I should be and he encouraged me to take advantage of this opportunity. His responsibilities at work changed like it did for a lot of other people so he was often working longer hours and was having to adapt to not only working from home, but his coworkers also working from home who he supports with tech requests. We have been enjoying the time in our house that we moved into two years ago but never got to really enjoy because we were either always working or traveling. Looking back at pictures from 2019, we realized how busy we were and how much we spent traveling so we have enjoyed having this year to slow down. 

This year we learned that grocery delivery is a game changer, ordered a lot of food from Philadelphia restaurants to support them and I took a lot of long walks exploring my neighborhood. Since I wasn’t working, I took the opportunity to spend the summer  with my parents in North Carolina. The summer I moved out of my childhood home, they also sold that house and moved to a house I had never seen in North Carolina. I’ve spent 3 day weekends here and there at the house and visiting them but it was never enough time to feel settled. This summer I was able to spend a lot of time outdoors and enjoy their pool, as well as spend some much needed time with my family. I finally was able to decorate my assigned bedroom at my parents house and go through my old things that got sent to North Carolina in the move. My mom and I worked on decorating a few rooms, a few renovation projects and spent a lot of time in the pool drinking sweet tea and reading books. With everything going on in the world, I knew I was lucky to spend this extra time with my family. In late August, my cousins and Jake joined us for a week at my parents house to have a mini family reunion. Since then we have experienced some health issues in our family and I’m grateful for FaceTime and weekly Zoom calls with my family this year. 

In the next few weeks, I’ll go back to applying to jobs since the vaccine is finally here! While I’ve enjoyed this time off, I admit that I’ve missed working and being social with other people besides by roommates (Jake and Ed). I’m making a list of things I am excited to do this year. Even though things didn’t magically improve over night at midnight, I know that we have the drive and tools to make this year a good one. 

As I look forward to 2021, I can’t help but notice how much I’ve learned this past year. I’ve grown as a person and have built up my self confidence. I’m motivated to get back to work and put more effort into my blog. I’ve seen what happens when I commit to a schedule and plan content so I hope to build on top of that. This year I learned to slow down and it’s something that I will take with me going into this new normal. Before I thought that your life revolved around your job and now I want to really find that balance of working and having a life outside of work. Life is too short not to travel and not see family. Jake and I have already booked a cruise for next summer because we wanted to look forward to something. My parents and I have become closer and I have renewed my relationship with my brother. With a world that made us stay apart, we clung to ways to stay connected and schedule time to socialize with each other. I’m grateful for what 2020 has taught me but boy, am I excited to see it go!

G O A L S
Get dressed every day.
Commit to a blog schedule and plan ahead content.
Feel more comfortable on Instagram Stories.
Find a job that fulfills me and allows a good personal/work balance. 
Get back into a fitness routine and eat healthy. 
Continue cooking healthy meals from scratch. 
Weekly baths on Sundays.
Read a book a month. 
Become a morning person. 
Schedule weekly date nights with Jake. 
Buy a car.
Hire a cleaning service to clean the house once it’s safe. 
Be positive. 
Use all the products I have before buying more.